Thursday, December 30, 2010

contrast and contradiction

The time of year is upon us. Yup. All the crazy resolutions pouring out. The holiday hangover. It's just an odd time of year. I've decided not to set a 'resolution' or even one specific goal for myself for the coming year. Sure, I'll try to stay in shape. I will try to stay organized. I will work on taking it easy...occasionally. But these are things we should work on everyday...not with some extra push because it's a new year. What I will do, now, at year end, is reflect on this year that has escaped.

The past several months have been very interesting indeed. I've made multiple trips to the east coast. I've seen days filled with complete contradictions and contrasting elements. An island that is far from the Pacific Northwest. An island filled with people that rely heavily on tourists to help them make enough to eat and survive...and within the same view, on the same island, a multi-million dollar complex, a casino, stretches into the sky. Poverty and excessive spending balance each other out.

On this same trip, I ate some of the worst food, at the airport. The next evening I dined in one of the finest restaurants. I have stayed in a run down motel and the next night aboard an extravagant ship. All of these things hit home as I was in flight back to the west coast. I thought about the contrast in our lives. How the balance we find, or the balance we struggle to find, is what I have searched for.

I was recently scolded for saying that we could skip the rest of December and move on to 2011. I was kidding of course. Well, sort of. 2010 was indeed a rough year. But, perhaps it was what I needed to make for a very successful 2011? Perhaps it was what I needed so that I could see what I had? Perhaps it was needed to get me moving again?

And as this year comes to a close, I see a year full of contrast much like the last few months. I had some of the highest moments of my life followed by the lowest. Old friendships strengthened to levels I wouldn't have thought possible-- and at the same time I lost friends that I thought would be in my life forever. I discovered more about myself in a six month period than I had ever thought possible. Funny thing is...I am no closer in knowing what I want or where to go now. However, I do know what is important in my life and will continue to search for a path that will take me further along--and on that path I hope I find more answers, more questions and more friends.

So I enter another year...but I won't forget those incredible moments from the last.